I don't want to assume or overcomplicate this. To presume upon these artistic and creative feelings that I now understand God, how He works, all that He does, and to present myself as one completely fine with the idea that He is sovereign over all things. I feel that way right now because I feel that we have weathered a big life event, yet if I'm honest, it was easier to love him in that moment because he wanted to be loved, cared for, and encouraged. It was easier to see the physical temptations because God was good to point them out to me. Even now, I started writing as if I was the one who handled the situation so well